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i am blessed.
i know i have mentioned that fact before, but i'm saying it again.
if i ever forget that i am blessed, then i can just read this post and remind myself that it's true!
this past weekend, my son Josh came home from university for a break from school and some good old fashioned family lovin'!
we are a very close family, and i can't blame him for missing the love and support of his family, my awesome cooking skills, and of course, his own bed and ceiling fan.
along for the ride, was my daughter's boyfriend, Jake. he's a great teenager himself, and he's a great boyfriend to our daughter. no complaints here.
Jake and Emilie have just celebrated their 2 year anniversary (which had a little blip in the middle, like most romances) , and they asked if i would take a few photos of them.
of course they ask this of me when i'm making soup, making omelets for everyone, making cinnamon buns AND getting ready to drive in Windsor for my other son's symphony rehearsal.
sure, i'll just drop everything and do a photo shoot RIGHT NOW!!!
ok, so i'm a sucker for begging and i gave in for a few minutes.
before i share a few photos, i just wanted to take a minute and use this blog for a little soap-box preaching!
no, i won't get all 'Jerry Fallwell' on anyone, but i wanted to take a minute to talk about parenting.
it's just a minute, so please indulge me.
way back when our kids were small, Darryl and i used to dream of the day when they would be able to take care of themselves and move on with their lives!
i know that sounds horrible, but there were days that i really did dream of these things.
as a parent of 3 small children, i felt buried under the pressure to be a great mom, even though being a mom had never been a dream of mine. of course, some girls grow up and dream of being the best mom in the world, having 8 kids, and never looking back.
i didn't have these dreams.
i felt guilt over these feelings, but i plugged along because i loved these little drool-faces more than i could have imagined possible.
there were many weeks and days that i parented alone, since Darryl went from being in school full-time for 4 years, to working 2 jobs, then to a new job in Windsor that demanded lots of attention during RRSP & tax season (he's a financial advisor).
of course, there were days that i begrudged our choice to have me stay at home and be the domesticated mom. i had big dreams, big plans, and wanted time for ME!
being a full-time mom didn't lend itself to having much ME time.
of course, i loved the time with my kids most of the time, but i remember wishing they could wipe their own butts, do their own laundry, and even move out one day!
darryl and i dreamed of traveling and having adventures of our own, especially since we were 22 when Josh was born , and i was 26 when my last kid came around.
fast forward to today.....
i spend many hours wishing that my kids were small again, so that we could snuggle up on the couch and read books, play hide and seek , so puzzles and sing stupid songs.
how come i wished their younger years away, when i should have treasured every moment.
i should have treasured every snot filled, temper tantrum moment, because i didn't know how wonderful they were until they were gone.
of course, i wouldn't trade my kids in for anything.
i love them so much that it hurts.
our kids are all beautiful people, inside and out. they all follow the Lord in their lives, they are phenomenal students, and just the funniest kids around!
i always thought that i'd regret wasting years on being a full-time mom, because i didn't see the importance of it back then, but....
i have realized that my children wouldn't be the people that they are, if i hadn't given them every ounce of my being for all of those years.
my kids love science because i have nurtured a love of it in them, and looking at the world around us to see how awesome it is (which has included catching bugs, looking closely at worms, talking about chemistry, and looking at tadpole eggs , to name a few things). my kids love music because we have always exposed them to music from the day they were born, and they are all talented musicians. my kids have a warped sense of humour, which Darryl would say is his influence, but i think i can take credit for a good chunk of it.
my kids love each other because we have always treated each other with so much love and respect, that i can't imagine them not adoring each other like they do (my kids will still ALL snuggle up together on a couch and cuddle. it's a serious love-fest).
we never had the money for me to stay home, but we did it anyways.
i always regretted not having my own life, since i got buried in the lives of my family and their needs. i always wished i had finished university, but now i see that it doesn't matter at all.
i always wanted something that i didn't have, but now i realize that what i did have was much better than anything i could have ever planned for myself.
i do regret all of my wishing, wanting and regrets, but that's in the past.
i will move forward , help to raise my teens and young adults, and keep working on becoming a wonderful wedding photographer & person.
i have to write about something that melted my heart this weekend....
on Saturday night, we were all watching Elf. i was sitting on the couch , sandwiched between Josh and Darryl, which is always a good place to be.
at one point, Josh looked at me, leaned over, and put his head on my shoulder for a good snuggle.
my heart almost melted as i held back the tears.
my 18 year old son still needs his mom, at least for a little while longer anyways.
ok, so here are some photos of Emilie and Jake
now, this is Josh. he is all about music and more music. i miss the music when he's not around, but it makes me appreciate it even more when he's home!
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three cute teenagers and my camera
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my dear blog readers,
I apologize for the long space between posts, but i am i have been away for a few days.
On Monday morning, I packed up my ugly minivan, with camera gear, computer and clothes, and drove across the border and to the town of Ann Arbor Michigan. Is it a city or a town?
I don't know, so sorry if i offend any residents!
i was on a journey to the Finao head office, where they were hosting a workshop, lead by the incomparable Chuck Arlund .
i have to admit, that 2 months ago, i had never heard of Chuck Arlund, let alone had the desire to take a workshop led by him.
that all changed when Finao decided to sponsor a workshop, and have Chuck come for 3 days to teach his rockstar skills and some off-camera lighting techniques.
i got the memo, looked up his website, emailed Zach Gray (who's also from Nashville and i thought he might have heard of Chuck) and quickly decided that this was the workshop for me.
off-camera lighting has always been something i've wanted to learn and perfect, but i've never met a wedding photographer around Windsor, that even uses an off-camera flash, let alone wan to teach me!
i knew i was on my own, but eager to learn. i've been reading blogs, websites, and forum posts about the elusive off-camera flash, pocket wizards, and the like, but it doesn't all make sense unless you can see it in action.
after i got lost and ended up on a little dirt road in the middle of nowhere, i made it safely to the Finao headquarters and met Chuck and my 6 other classmates 3 of whom i already knew (yep, small world).
i have to admit, that on Monday, i had the feeling (a few times) that my head was going to explode from all the data being shoved into the small space that i have left in there for new things. Chuck went over about a zillion items, from posing to photoshop, to art and beyond, and then out the door we went for a field trip! we were learning to find the perfect light, or the sweet spot and Chuck calls it.
tuesday was flash day, and after we all got over our fear of taking the flash OFF the camera, and learning about pocket wizards and radio poppers, ring lights and video lights. we had another little field trip, with a cute little model, and spent the day trying to learn the technique of having light on our side, and not fighting with it so much.
it was inspiring.
i didn't get very many photos with the flash (about 5 or 6) since there were a few people in the group that seemed to want tons, and we were sharing one set of pocket wizards between us all. it doesn't matter too much, since even in those 5 photos, i could see what Chuck was teaching us, and the by observing i learned even more.
it was a long day, but my head didn't explode, so that makes it another awesome day! LOL!
the 3rd day was mostly spent just going over a few photos in class, and then we all headed out the door and to the Detroit Institute of Art, for and Avedon exhibit.
wow, that's quite the exhibit!
i don't know what it is......
i just love getting the chance to meet new people, and make new friends. when making new friends is combined with learning and growing as an artist, then it's even BETTER!!!!
in my heart of hearts, i know that photography is my way of being an artist. i am thrilled to have had to opportunity to have my eyes opened to new things, be inspired by artists i'd never heard of before, and get to meet Chuck.
it was a wonderful 3 days.
here are 2 photos from the tuesday photo session.
i will be spending the winter, practicing and perfecting the technique, so that i can start bringing an edge to my art.
Amelia Thornton:
Hi Michele...super fun spending time with and getting to know you better. Please keep me posted if there are any get-togethers with the new crew as I would happily make the drive to hang out and be inspired again. Talk to you soon...
(10.25.09)
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Chuck Arlund ~ a workshop report
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i realized, when i posted my last few photos, that many of my new blog readers wouldn't have ever read my old blog. my old blog is where i posted TONS of underwater photos, but now i post mainly wedding photos. i'm not saying that being a wedding photographer here in the good ole city of Windsor isn't fun or exciting, it's just not underwater.
i wanted to just follow up with last week's blog post, and post a few more underwater goodies.
i do have a wedding to blog about, but you'll just have to wait till tomorrow to read about Laura-Beth and Rob's beautiful wedding day.
All of these photos were shot in Roatan Honduras, in the warm and tropical waters that surround the island.
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh....
Eliud Matos:
Michele, these are fantastic! Love them all, but the squid one is super cool.
(10.16.09)
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there are many people that ask me, about how i got into wedding photography, and i think that my answer surprises them.
i wasn't born with a camera in my hand, i wasn't mentored and inspired by my grandfather (even though that would have been awesome), i wasn't a photographer for the school newspaper, and i didn't get my degree in photography from a wonderful college or fine arts program.
these would have all been exciting and wonderful ways to learn the craft, but my way was much different than anyone i know.
it was fish.
yep, fish.
as a scuba diver, i was sucked into the world of underwater photography a few years ago. darryl was the one who wanted to learn to take underwater photos, and i actually didn't want anything to do with it!
i took photos of my kids, but that was it. i didn't want to learn a complicated camera (yeah, and i thought my Olympus C5060 point and shoot was complicated), and i just wanted to scuba dive.
we found out pretty quickly that Darryl HATED taking underwater photos, but i became addicted to it.
trust me when i say that, if i was younger and didn't have kids, i would have probably pursued a career with National Geographic or some other publication, so that i could take underwater photos for a living.
fish and i just get along well i guess, and i have the patience of a saint!
i can out-wait any fish that comes my way, and i could just lay on the bottom of the ocean all day and wait for something cool to swim by.
unfortunately, Windsor doesn't have many fish.
funny story......
darryl and i dove in Lake Erie a few years ago, and the visibility was so bad, that i actually swam head first right into the wreck we were diving! HAHAHA!!!
i lost darryl in the murkiness, and bumped my head right into a piece of wood.
even if there were fish in the lake, i don't think i would have seen them at all, since i couldn't see 3 inches in front of me.
there are no fish in Windsor, but there are weddings!!
i grew to love photography like crazy, and weddings are my new fish.
i just can't wait to get to the next one and see what new thing i can photograph.
i guess fish are on my mind, because Darryl and i just booked a trip to Roatan Honduras in May, and that's where i can lay on the bottom of the warm ocean, and wait for something cool to swim by.
on our trip to Roatan this past Christmas, i spent a 1/2 an hour, waiting for the perfect time to photograph this awesome, banded jaw-fish and its mouthful of eggs.
i also found a nudibranch for the first time, and a really cool blennie (a pretty rare one) too!
i figured it was fitting to post a few underwater photos again, since it's been too long.
John Chan:
Ah, there's that fish with the mouthful of eggs! That's wild.
(10.08.09)
St. Louis Wedding Photography<:
Michelle, these are great photographs! Yes, it is a bummer to live in cold places like we do (St. Louis for me). Thankfully we can travel to warmer climes : ) We will have to get together for some diving someday, I am always on the lookout for new dive Buddies! Are you going to be at the DWF convention this year? I'll be there, would be cool to meet you!
(11.03.09)
Stephanie Mailloux:
Seriously, those eel wormy things gave me shivers down my spine looking at the picture... how in the world did you swim in water with them, Hope it was good zooming on your camera's part... very cool pics though!
(11.12.09)
Carmen:
I have been to Roatan and Utila several times. Where did you stay in Roatan?
(01.16.10)
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a little underwater goodness
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every year, for the last 9 years, we have packed up our little family and taken the 16 hour drive from Windsor Ontario, to the Outer Banks, NC.
the house that we rent, is right near Frisco, which is a stones throw from Hatteras Village and the end of Hatteras Island.
it's an idyllic place, filled with wonderful memories for us.
as creatures of habit, we rent the same house every year, and we look at the same sunset, the same view, and lay on the exact same beach over and over again. why would we change things up when everything is perfect every time. sometimes i like change, but sometimes i just like to know that what i'm getting is awesome!
this year, the vacation was even sweeter than normal. not only did we not get to go on our 10 day camping trip to Tobermory, but i have been working 60 hours a week since January, trying to get my business up and running. i was burnt out.
seriously.
i have been photographing weddings, processing weddings, dreaming about weddings, having an aneurism while trying to figure out Lightroom and Photoshop's little inner workings and tricks, and it was time for a break.
wedding photography took a back seat to wave riding, sunbathing, eating junk food, laughing and playing games with my kids, and just staring out into the ocean and looking for dolphins.
it was heavenly.
the only downside to this awesome trip, was that our scuba diving charter got cancelled due to engine problems. i was pretty devastated, because supposedly there were quite a few sharks on the wrecks this year. it was also quite a hit, because we haven't done any diving this year at all, which is pretty sad indeed.
i did come back to a truckload of work, but the 10 day holiday at the beach did my brain some good, and i have a KILLER tan as well!
aren't my kids cute?
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our beach adventures~ from Windsor to Hatteras 2009
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I just wanted to say thank you for sharing this heartfelt post! It brought a tear to my eye as I look forward to one day having kids ... (a long ways away if my mom is reading this lol).
Again, thank you for sharing your life with me (with everyone I guess) and I look up to you in so many ways!! You do have great kids ... can't wait to see the legacy grow that you've laid excellent foundations for! :)
Hope that you're having a good night ....
(11.23.09)Michele-I can't tell you how much this post meant to me to read. I have felt these feelings too many time and I have questioned my choice to be a stay-at-home mom so many times. Am I doing the right thing or is it more important for me to go out and work outside the home. Thank you for helping me realize the importance and value of my choice and the rewards I will benefit from it as my children grow and change.
(11.24.09)It looks and sounds like you've got wonderful kids. That's what it's all about. Your photographs are delightful!
(11.25.09)Love what you wrote, and I really admire what you've done, raising a family so young.. for at 24 now it all still seems so far away, I feel like I'm still a kid myself. Anyway, the photos are just gorgeous too! LOVE the light! Glad you gave in.. :)
(11.25.09)I loved this post. Thanks so much for your words and honesty and sharing your heart. Great shots :)
(11.25.09)Wow, I love these shots, it's so hard to have teenagers become emotional and free with you as a photographer but you did a great job. The post was marvelous and the pictures look superb. I love the emotion and playful atmosphere of the shots. Very well captured!
(12.14.09)Very nice set with the couple. I love the styling
(12.17.09)Michelle, I've just spent the last couple of hours exploring your blog. What a wonderful family you have raised, beautiful children and your abilities as a photographer are extraordinary. Feel free to visit my blog and read about my life. (Darryl's) Aunt Barb xox
(05.06.10)